You Can’t Make This Stuff Up ~Living In A World Of Pop Up Relationships

It hit me pretty hard this morning as the tears were rolling down my cheeks.

We are truly living in a world of “pop up relationships.”

What is that?

It is a deep soul connection with another long distance who you will never see or meet and when one of those relationships wrote to me “about our plans,” I had a pit in my stomach realizing that we were only sending texts to each other 3,000 miles away on a laptop on my end and an iPhone on their end that that it was only a matter of time until it ended.

It was a “pop up relationship” in the moment with a deep connection that would never be fulfilled.

The longest professional relationship that I had long distance was with Kate Kahn from 1995 until the year 2000 when we drifted apart.

She was in Houston and I was in Oceanside, California.

We only met twice in person but the creative sparks were flying because I felt I had a real talk radio partner who I could work with long distance even though it would only be by email and by phone.

From time to time we would mail a package to each other, a birthday card or an item related to talk radio that inspired us.

There was something even deeper about Kate that I never shared in public.

Five years after our partnership started, she called me one day mid-morning to share something with me that was deeply personal.

She had never told this to anyone in public.

Her closest friends knew but it was hidden behind a curtain.

What was the secret?

Kate had been born as a man and didn’t feel right in his body and in the 1980s began hormonal therapy as well as the physical therapy and operation (multiple cuttings of the knife) to transform him into a her.

You see, I never knew Kate as a man, I only knew her as a woman and she was so kind to me, my wife, and my children.

She saw me as a “thoughtful kind man.”

Kate was the greatest talk radio producer I ever me and she edited my radio shows with a style and grace that made me sound so much better than I was.

Once I asked her if it was a fraud to edit shows so perfectly.

Kate would laugh and simply say, “I’m editing your talk show in a way of the man you will become on air and you are not there yet but you’ll get there.”

She gave me the strength to take risks, reach out to famous people who were strangers and get them on my show.

Yeah, I only knew Kate as a woman.

She shared her darkest secrets with me.

Those secrets never changed the form of our deep connection or friendship because without her, I never would have learned how to produce great talk radio and to ride the wave of political hoops that I had to deal with at the large radio networks.

Thanks for the mentorship Kate.

Thanks for the partnership Kate.

Thanks for the love and kindness that you showed my family.

I’ll never forget you Kate.

You represent a time in my life that will never come again and what crazy times we had long distance.

Living in Oceanside with my wife and kids.

Driving up to a small world class recording studio in Burbank California because that is where I could pick up celebrity interviews.

Thanks Kate, I will never forget YOU or what You did for ME.

God bless you soul sister.